Annoyed by Multitasking Phone Conversations
Should she just be grateful that they are calling?
Whenever she chats with her family, their multitasking phone conversations disappoint her. Advice columnist Eric Thomas weighs in.
Dear Eric:
The only time I spend any time talking on the phone is with three family members.
Though I enjoy and treasure those conversations, it frustrates me that the only time they call is when they are either driving somewhere or doing a walk. Therefore, our phone connection is frequently not the best and/or they’re distracted.
There’s a part of me that wants to say “call me when you can just sit down and visit” but all three seem to have such full and busy lives that the other part of me is grateful they take the time to call.
I, too, could be in the middle of something but I stop and enjoy our conversation giving it my full attention.
Should I suggest they call when they can give me 100 percent of their attention or continue to be grateful they’re even fitting me in their life? These multitasking phone conversations seem disrespectful.
– Call Waiting
Dear Call:
Ask for what you need to make the most of the time you have together. Your family members are free to make an adjustment, to politely decline, or to suggest a compromise. But you won’t get there unless you make your feelings known.
I have a close relative who doesn’t like to talk on the phone if I’m out in public. It stresses the relative out, worrying that I’ll be distracted by the phone call and not be alert enough to my surroundings. It took a little trial and error for me to accept this, I’ll admit. But now it brings me a lot of joy to be intentional about finding an indoor place to have our calls.
We all have our habits and our wants. Sometimes those wants don’t jibe. You’re grateful they’re fitting you into their lives, but hopefully they’re grateful that you’re making time for them, too, and want that time to be meaningful. Relationships thrive on all parties involved feeling free enough, and cared for enough, to ask for what they need.
R. Eric Thomas (he/him) is a national bestselling author, playwright, and screenwriter. His accomplishments include “Eric Reads the News,” a daily humor column covering pop culture and politics, serving as the interim Prudie for the advice column “Dear Prudence,” and “Congratulations, The Best Is Over.”
Send questions to eric@askingeric.com or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.
©2025 Tribune Content Agency, LLC.
Find more words of wisdom like multitasking phone conversations, from insensitive parents to a husband’s mid-life crisis, DNA surprises, and more:
Boomer Advice for Life department
For advice targeted to senior adults and their families – like caregiving, grandparenting, retirement communities:
