Nervous for the Second Act
Should he or shouldn’t he change jobs?
A 40-year-old is ready for a career change, but he’s nervous for the second act. Should he or shouldn’t he? Advice columnist Eric Thomas weighs in.
Dear Eric:
After two decades working in the same organization and several years in my actual position, I’ve been wanting a change. I actually like my job but now in my mid-40s feel like I need to change things up for the second half of my career.
Between my wife’s income and some savings, we could get by financially for a while.
I’ve resigned twice and gone back both times saying let’s give it more time. While some friends are supportive and completely understand where I’m coming from, others (especially my parents) are highly concerned about me finding another job. I’m not even that worried about it, I really just want a break from work and the opportunity to come back refocused later.
But I keep having so much doubt and second-guessing myself, especially when others express such nervousness. Any tips on deciding whether or not to take the big leap?
– Nervous for the Second Act
Dear Second Act:
In another part of my life, I’m a playwright and so I think a lot about second acts. It’s crucial that you set up the action of the second act in the first. You may not know everything that’s going to happen, but when the curtain rises after intermission, you’re not starting from scratch.
Similarly, I suggest you do some thinking and planning about what you want to try or explore after leaving your job. How are you going to come back refocused? Change doesn’t just happen. But you can create the conditions for it.
You don’t necessarily need to know what job you’d be going into (although, it’s always a good idea to have something else lined up). But you can start planning for the “after” right now. Are you hoping to learn a new skill, connect with a different part of yourself, reset your life? Start laying the groundwork now.
Take a class or a workshop over a weekend or at night. Apprentice yourself. Cultivate interests in your current life, beyond your job, so that you can carry those interests into the next chapter.
R. Eric Thomas (he/him) is a national bestselling author, playwright, and screenwriter. His accomplishments include “Eric Reads the News,” a daily humor column covering pop culture and politics, serving as the interim Prudie for the advice column “Dear Prudence,” and “Congratulations, The Best Is Over.”
Send questions to eric@askingeric.com or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.
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