Nervous for the Second Act
Should he or shouldn’t he change jobs?
A 40-year-old is ready for a career change, but he’s nervous for the second act. Should he or shouldn’t he? Advice columnist Eric Thomas weighs in.
ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED JULY 10, 2026; UPDATED AUG. 6, 2026, WITH READER REPLY
Dear Eric:
After two decades working in the same organization and several years in my actual position, I’ve been wanting a change. I actually like my job but now in my mid-40s feel like I need to change things up for the second half of my career.
Between my wife’s income and some savings, we could get by financially for a while.
I’ve resigned twice and gone back both times saying let’s give it more time. While some friends are supportive and completely understand where I’m coming from, others (especially my parents) are highly concerned about me finding another job. I’m not even that worried about it, I really just want a break from work and the opportunity to come back refocused later.
But I keep having so much doubt and second-guessing myself, especially when others express such nervousness. Any tips on deciding whether or not to take the big leap?
– Nervous for the Second Act
Dear Second Act:
In another part of my life, I’m a playwright and so I think a lot about second acts. It’s crucial that you set up the action of the second act in the first. You may not know everything that’s going to happen, but when the curtain rises after intermission, you’re not starting from scratch.
Similarly, I suggest you do some thinking and planning about what you want to try or explore after leaving your job. How are you going to come back refocused? Change doesn’t just happen. But you can create the conditions for it.
You don’t necessarily need to know what job you’d be going into (although, it’s always a good idea to have something else lined up). But you can start planning for the “after” right now. Are you hoping to learn a new skill, connect with a different part of yourself, reset your life? Start laying the groundwork now.
Take a class or a workshop over a weekend or at night. Apprentice yourself. Cultivate interests in your current life, beyond your job, so that you can carry those interests into the next chapter.
Reader reply to Nervous for the Second Act
Dear Eric:
I’d like to add to your response to the letter from “Second Act” who was considering a career change.
I changed careers in my early 40s after spending two decades as an account executive in media sales. In researching my next step, I enlisted the help of a life/career coach. Her suggestion was to interview people in the profession I wanted to enter; with questions about experiences in the broad context of their work life. In my case, this was contacting mental health professionals. These interviews were a vital part of my transition to clinical social work through a graduate degree. I happily spent more than 25 years as a mental health clinician.
As a midlife career changer, we take some of the skills we learn in our first career with us to the second. All experience matters.
– Happy Second Act
Dear Second Act:
Thanks for writing! Enlisting the services of a career counselor can be a gamechanger. These professionals are trained to help clients work through the logistical, professional, and emotional challenges of a career change (and many other work hurdles).
Additionally, it’s very wise to talk to others in the field one is considering entering. Their experiences and connections can help lay the groundwork for a successful transition.
R. Eric Thomas (he/him) is a national bestselling author, playwright, and screenwriter. His accomplishments include “Eric Reads the News,” a daily humor column covering pop culture and politics, serving as the interim Prudie for the advice column “Dear Prudence,” and “Congratulations, The Best Is Over.”
Send questions to eric@askingeric.com or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.
©2025 Tribune Content Agency, LLC.
Find more words of wisdom like someone nervous for the second act: from insensitive parents to a husband’s mid-life crisis, and DNA surprises
Boomer Advice for Life department
For advice targeted to senior adults and their families – such as caregiving, grandparenting, and retirement communities
