Criticism for Avoiding Hearing Aids
His brothers and his coworkers offer their unsolicited opinions
Despite his years of acknowledged hearing loss, a man is still avoiding hearing aids. Now his brothers are pestering him and coworkers are needling him. Advice columnist Eric Thomas weighs in.
Dear Eric:
I am 60 years old and have had hearing loss since grade school. I’d flunk all those screening tests. My two younger siblings also have my same type of hearing loss and have worn hearing aids since their 40s at least.
My siblings are persistent in trying to get me to buy hearing aids, which they feel I need. Yes, I probably need them according to medical tests, but I am avoiding hearing aids due to vanity and, more practically, cost.
I am tired of being judged for my loss of hearing. My siblings came at me today, together, and approached me intervention-style to tell me when and where to buy hearing aids.
People at work have made rude comments pertaining to my hearing. “Oh, you’re so deaf,” “We know you can’t hear us anyway,” et cetera.
Please tell me what to say to people who think my hearing is their business and how to address comments that are so rude. And when I do decide to get hearing aids, how should I respond to the comments I know I’ll get about how much better it is, now you can hear, oh finally you can hear?
– Hearing Jokes
Dear Hearing:
Let’s take your siblings and your coworkers separately. Your coworkers are being too cavalier with their comments. They’re not trying to goad you into seeking treatment; they’re mocking you for a medical condition. They may know that you’ve taken a bold stance about your hearing loss and see that as permission to tease you about it, but they’re overstepping. This is a chance for you to talk to HR about what’s appropriate conversation for the workplace. You can also talk to HR, if you’d like, about options for hearing assistance in your company’s insurance plan.
If your company doesn’t have HR, or you’d rather deal with this head-on, be direct but don’t get drawn into a back-and-forth about it. “It’s inappropriate and unkind for you to make fun of my abilities. If you have an issue with the way I do my job, please address it with me professionally, or we can talk about it with a supervisor.”
As to your siblings, you are obviously entitled to do whatever you want with your body and your health, including avoiding hearing aids. But I’d encourage you to think about their input, aggressive though it may be, as coming from a place of legitimate concern.
Because they share the same hearing loss, they’ve likely had a lot of conversations with medical professionals about their options and their quality of life and so they may feel they’re well-positioned to advise you.
They may fear you’re depriving yourself, or they may be concerned about the increased risk of isolation or the link between hearing loss and dementia. In short, they may see this as an emergency situation. You don’t have to agree. But I would encourage you to think of it less as judgment and more as a hand reaching out, offering help.
Are Over-the-Counter Hearing Aids a Fit for You?
R. Eric Thomas (he/him) is a national bestselling author, playwright, and screenwriter. His accomplishments include “Eric Reads the News,” a daily humor column covering pop culture and politics, serving as the interim Prudie for the advice column “Dear Prudence,” and “Congratulations, The Best Is Over.”
Send questions to eric@askingeric.com or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.
©2025 Tribune Content Agency, LLC.
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