Ghosted by Longtime Friends

By Amy Dickinson | August 12th, 2022

But now concerned about their health – should we reach out?


Concerned woman looking at laptop. Photo by Fizkes, Dreamstime. Longtime friends ghosted her and cut off contact, but now she is concerned for their health. Should she reach out? See what Ask Amy says. Image

The writer tells advice columnist Amy Dickinson that longtime friends ghosted her and her husband and cut off contact, but now she is concerned for their health. Should she reach out? See what Ask Amy says.


Dear Amy:

Several years ago, longtime friends ghosted us.

There was no argument that precipitated that occurrence.

I asked what was wrong and was told that she and her husband “have decided to travel alone because they are fuddie-duddies.”

We had vacationed together for years and there was no change in how we did the arrangements.

They totally cut us off after this and there has been no contact since.

A recent picture on social media showed the spouse looking quite frail, as if they were on chemo.

I don’t know whether to reach out, since I do not know for sure – or whether to let things stand as they are.

What do you think?

Ghosted Friend

Dear Friend:

If you are connected with this couple on social media, then you have a channel through which to communicate.

Yes, I think you should reach out. You do not need to refer to the frail appearance of this spouse, but you could message them to say, “I just saw a picture of ‘George’ on FB and it made me think of you and to remember some of our times together. I hope you are both doing OK, and encourage you to reach out if ever you would like to be in touch.”


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In the tradition of the great personal advice columnists, Chicago Tribune’s Amy Dickinson is a plainspoken straight shooter who relates to readers of all ages. She answers personal questions by addressing issues from both her head and her heart – ranging from relationships to DNA surprises. A solid reporter, Dickinson researches her topics to provide readers with informed opinions and answers. Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068

© 2022 by Amy Dickinson

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