Advice from Amy: Toting Leftover Containers to a Dinner Party

By Amy Dickinson | October 29th, 2021

Plus a reader reply to the mother concerned about her daughter’s older boyfriend


People celebrating with Champagne at a dinner party. Photo Rawpixelimages Dreamstime. For article on Taking Leftover Containers to a Dinner Party

Advice columnist Amy Dickinson tries to settle a debate between a husband and wife about taking leftover containers to a dinner party. Is it practical and helpful or tacky and inconsiderate?


Dear Amy:

Please help to settle a debate I am having with my wife.

With the holidays fast approaching and large family meals on the horizon, I say it is “OK” to arrive at these meals with our own containers for leftovers.

I feel it is helpful to the host, who would like to send food home with the guests.

My wife believes it is inconsiderate.

What is your opinion?

– Looking for Leftovers

Dear Looking:

Greeting your host with your Gladware out and at the ready is definitely gauche.

Not all hosts want to send leftovers home with their guests.

Some may believe that enjoying a few days of leftovers after hosting a large dinner with many guests is a great benefit of hosting. (It’s hard to imagine voluntarily surrendering the all-important leftover turkey sandwich ingredients.)

However, if you want to keep some containers in your car or your bag, these might come in very handy if the host decides to send leftovers home.

I’m also wondering if a pack of new “takeaway” containers might be a nice gift for the host – along with flowers, wine, or whatever dish you may contribute to the meal.


Ask Amy: Does ‘You break it, you buy it’ apply to dinner parties?


Reader reply to “My daughter is dating an older man

From the Ask Amy column on Oct. 13

Dear Amy:

“Caring Mom” was concerned over the 17-year age difference between her daughter and the man she was currently dating.

The mother described him as kind, intelligent, grounded, and respectful.

This man sounds like my father!

My parents married in 1950 when my mom was 19 and my father, 40. He was German and she was American. He was Jewish and she was Protestant. Dad was exceedingly well-educated and mom had a high school diploma.

But did it matter? Not one iota!

My parents were exceedingly happy for 50 years until my father’s death in the year 2000. I do believe that they were (if possible) more in love after 50 years than on their wedding day.

My two brothers and I grew up in a house filled with affection and a happy, stable marriage.

If they end up being even one-tenth as happy as my parents, they will be a lucky couple, indeed.

– Grateful

Dear Grateful:

A wonderful tribute.


Want to get even more life tips from Amy? Read more of her advice columns here!


In the tradition of the great personal advice columnists, Chicago Tribune’s Amy Dickinson is a plainspoken straight shooter who relates to readers of all ages. She answers personal questions by addressing issues from both her head and her heart, from taking leftover containers to a dinner party to relationship issues. A solid reporter, Dickinson researches her topics to provide readers with informed opinions and answers. Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068

© 2021 by Amy Dickinson

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